Can I have a broken drum for Christmas?
The best thing you could have asked for. You can't beat it!

Can I have a puppy for Christmas?
Certainly not. You can have turkey like everybody else!

Dear Father Christmas, this Christmas could you please send me a yellow door.
Yours, Sherlock Holmes
Watson: So why do you want a yellow door Holmes?
Lemon-entry my dear watson.

Dear Father Christmas, could you please send me a musical instrument.
Thank you, Yours A. Fisherman
Father Christmas: That's easy, we'll send him a cast-a-net.

Dear Father Christmas, could you please send me some Crocodile shoes?
Father Christmas: Can't do that one. He hasn't said what size his crocodile takes!

I am nearly bald. This Christmas, could you please send me something to keep my hair in.
Father Christmas: Send him a paper bag, and a comb I'll bet he never parts with it!